I need a toolbox for myself, since I have crossed human level of damage by miles already. My screws and springs are coming off like broken wall-e, thanks to my simple (self-destructive) coping system. I see hard day coming -> I over-occupy myself -> I drive myself to physical, mental and emotional fatigue.. I feel... Continue Reading →
What do you do when you see a huge wave galloping towards you? It has power to destroy you in every way and there’s no way you can fight it. You can’t try to hop on it and start surfing. You can’t run away from it, nature is a million times faster than your legs.... Continue Reading →
I pulled out my cosmetic bag from a rubble of random stuff that sat in a corner of our room. As this is room of a designing student, we have whole mountain range of random art supplies. That’s where I stacked my stuff too until flights resume. My bag had a layer of dust as... Continue Reading →
Ok people I really wan tto share alot of things with you guys so grab your popcorns. A small bag would be enough. Last few months have been very hard on me. Well I think I have been saying this since 2 years now. Anyway. So last 2 months I saw ugliest faces of people... Continue Reading →
Ever checked your youtube likes?? Recently I was looking for a tutorial I was sure I liked some time back and it was like pushing the replay button. I could see my journey of last few years and my struggles to cope with whatever was happening around me or with me. And I could see... Continue Reading →
This post is by one of my favourite people on wordpress. such a kind yet brave soul. I look at her for inspiration and I mean it.
Her account of the experience mentioned in this post moved me and broke me.
Please do pay a visit to the blog of this true warrior.
IN THERAPY TODAY A LOT CAME UP. EMILY STARTED OFF THE SESSION. SHE TALKED A LITTLE TO EILEEN ABOUT THE WEEKN, ABOUT TIME LOSS, ABOUT THE SYSTEM, ABOUT WHO WAS STRUGGLING ETC. THAT WENT WELL. THEN SHE TOLD EILEEN HOW WE ARENT SLEEPING AT NIGHT. BECAUSE WE ARE TOO SCARED. THE KIDS ARE AFRAID OF THE DARK. THE DARKS HAVE BEEN HAVING MEMORIES, THERE WAS SUMMER SOLSTACE, THAT WAS HARD FOR US. EILEEN LISTENED. THEN SHE SAID SHE’D LIKE TO HAVE A CONFERENCE WITH ALL OF THE ADULTS. SHE FIRST TALKED A LITTLE TO THE KIDS, THOUGH. SHE TOLD THEM ALL TO GO INTO THE SAFE ROOM INSIDE, AND TO EITHER PLAY, OR SLEEP, OR SOMETHING, BUT THAT SHE WAS GOING TO TALK TO THE ADULTS AND TRY TO FIGURE OUT A FEW THINGS. THEY WERE ALL OK WITH THAT. SO SHE HAD US ALL GO TO OUR CONFERENCE ROOM…
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Either you succumb to life or you desperately look for some way to survive. I chose the latter. It’s not easy. It's petrifying to say the least. It’s an internal world war between all your fears. But I if I see myself 5 years into future.. I don't regret choosing to fight even if I... Continue Reading →
Yesterday was riddled with crippling fear. We all get nightmares but there are very few of them that make you scream in sleep. And when it involves your loved ones it’s nearly impossible to deal with it. For hours I was shaking. 10 hours I was constantly fighting the fear trying in vain to at... Continue Reading →
Well shit happens Sometimes shit becomes a chewing gum and keeps stretching.. But keep rowing guys.. You don't really have choice. I am seriously disappointed beyond believe by most of the people. But i have a solid clan standing by me. One of them at least is all the time with me. It's a big... Continue Reading →
I was shiver and shaking again Pelted by lies and deceit It was an uncontrollable fit My bones hurt I was falling apart Until finally The sleep embraced me Before my final collapse Somebody had to save me right? I woke up a stranger A new person A new world A new life A blank... Continue Reading →
Stoner on a rollercoaster 
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