I have been thinking
Most of our decisions are actually driven by emotions.
The very first feeling sticks with us.
We start to paint coats and coats of logic and reasoning and pros and cons, just so that we can call it a calculated decision, the most sensible one.
Because we are afraid of looking like emotional fools.
It’s more convenient to look like an asshole than an emotional/expressive person.
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Hmmmm ….. I think you might be talking specifically about personal decisions – in which case emotions are a significant ingredient in the mix. But very many decisions are not personal (or, at least, shouldn’t be), in which case it might be both unwise and selfish to allow one’s own emotions a vote in the process.
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Excellent, although I think the take here is to see that we are fooling ourselves if we say that there is any decision that does not partake of emotions. Such an emotionless stance could be captured in the “coats of logic.”
Still, a sharp point for a dialectic.
Joy to you.
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On second thought, it does seem the author would concede that there are such emotionless decisions, since he begins the piece with “Most of our decisions involve emotions.” In which case I would go more than a bit further than the author.
I also loved your saying “vote on it” at the end of your comment, since it more than hints at cases in which we need a severe critical eye towards our emotions!
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she*
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I apologize for my thoughtlessness here.
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it’s ok. almost everyone thought the same when they came here. i still don’t know why
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For my part, I think it was thoughtlessness, not a feeling or tone I got from your words. You are wonderful, I gathered that much!
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Thanks 🙂
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It’s actually professional but feels like personal. I just secured a very good job offer but my current employer just recently promoted me. The opportunity is too good to miss and i wont be getting anything like this any sooner.
But again current ones have been nice to me even one the whole culture was toxic.
I felt like my healt leaned towards my current employer and i have been making excuses to justify it as a logical decision.
Unwise i get. How is this selfish?
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It’s not selfish at all. I would consider this to be a personal decision, because it’s primarily about your own future and your comfort with making a decision one way or another.
On the other hand, if you were to make decisions on behalf of the company you work for in your best interests rather than those of the company and, therefore your fellow employees then such a decision might be viewed as selfish.
I only point this out because, in a former life, my prime responsibility was in making decisions impacting others, but there was always the potential to sway the decision in my own favour.
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you are right. it is personal decision. but i already feel guilty if i try to be selfish. i might do a whole pro-con here, the whole thing is not as simple but if i want to climb the ladder faster and recover from lost years of career gap, this is the best opportunity.
but my bosses, the whole upper management actually aknowlegded my hardwork which is not that common. i kinda feel i owe them. and honestly i have self-doubts too. will i be able to do justice with that position its literally 2 posotions above.
i have so many questions, it’s crippling. and audit period, so workload. and family required me time and energy a lot these days.
by the end of it all, my mind will be a baloon, i hope not a helium one.
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Well, perhaps you should concede that any decision will inevitably be a selfish one. Either you will go down the path of personal advancement or you will appease your feelings of guilt. Either way you will be doing whatever makes you feel better…. which is … you know … selfish. And human.
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now i will start crying. so i am a-hole either way.
i’m so occupied with other stuff, i’m thinking i will just go with the flow and see when i get to that point where i have to accept or reject the offer. Haven’t gotten the official letter yet.
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We are all ‘a-holes’ when it comes right down to it. But, if you go with the flow and end up still looking like one you can always say, “who? me? I was just going with the flow … “
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“The very first feeling sticks with us….” And what a journey it can be to understand that feeling! As is so often lost precisely in the “coats of logic!” Joy to you for sharing this piece. Joy in the course of your wholesome fight.
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Thanks. The hardest part is to decide if we should follow the first feeling or the coats are more practical.
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I agree. And sometimes, it can seem as though the coats are just futher, conflicting, emotions.
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umm i just make excuses.
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Sometimes we think we are “making” excuses while something else is making something of us. Our excuses, taken together, can turn out to be the spinning out of the long thread of our destiny.
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hmm. if everything is part of that long thread (which i also believe in), i wonder why do we ever have to make choices? it would have been easier otherwise
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A decision itself can be the most fateful of fated things. It is indeed a wonder!
http://love-the-dust.com/2023/02/20/cuts/
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So true!
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So, in the end of the day we are emotional fools.
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Yep! 😂
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I have always been partial to emotional fools. Perhaps it’s because I feel as thought they are apart of my tribe.
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ahaha me too. an emotional fool understands the other. birds of same feather lol
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You, (we ;)) have heart!
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That i know 🙂
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