We have been normalizing a wrong trend since centuries and it’s soo deep-rooted you look selfish when you talk about it.
My very close friend (unicorn) who has been with be through my hardest times. Has caught the virus along-with her whole family. She, her husband, kids all of them are really unwell.
Even though she was equally unwell, she still stood up to take care of her family.
I get it. One of them have to take charge.
But she is cooking, rather than ordering food just because people will say she doesn’t do enough for her family. People will judge her for resting or taking care of herself the way she was taking care of rest of her family.
She refuses to accept any sort of favour or help for the same reason.
I used to agree with her to an extent but now this is getting serious. Her health, even before cover start to deplete fast.
She has multiple health issues and they all are getting worse.
Because she is expected to sacrifice her health, only then she will be considered a home-maker.
What the fuck is wrong with us. What pleasure do we get watching people ruining their lives to please everyone else.
I saw my mother do it, I saw most women in my culture do it.
A women resting is not acceptable, she has to be doing something.
It’s inhumane.
Everyone should have the right to having a normal life where they could eat, work, rest and live like rest of the family.
We need to stop glorifying the concept that every woman has to sacrifice some or most of their basic human rights to qualify to be a woman.
Otherwise she is mean, outspoken, selfish person.
If you are not giving your husband water it shouldn’t make you a bad wife, it should make the man a lazy and dependent person who have no consideration of her woman’s well being.
Same goes for men too. Especially when it comes to finances.
To be a good husband, son, brother, he shouldn’t have to sacrifice his own health and comforts.
I’m not talking about turning a blind eye when your family or friends suffer.
Be there. Help them. But it shouldn’t be at the price of your own needs.
And honestly I haven’t even seen this working.
You finish your life and in the end nobody even acknowledges it because you have been this way all your life and for them you were obliged to serve them and never were supposed to have your own life.
We need to establish a balance.
If you are the one sacrificing and compromising all the time, start doing little things for yourself too. Nobody can handle abrupt changes. Just start taking baby steps.
It’s for your own health. If you’re doing better you will able to be there for others better.
If this is happening in your family, start rotating duties if possible.
One person shouldn’t be bearing load of the whole family.
The whole concept needs to end now and it’s not that hard.
People need acknowledgement and validation for what they do for their families. Please give them that.
If you are on the other side, made sure people know what you are doing. Make sure your efforts are recognized. If they aren’t, you need to step up for yourself.
You will ruin your life and nobody will care one bit.
I know it’s easier said than done. It’s hard in the beginning but with time people realize the whole system has been wrong and they need to move their a** and be responsible.
I don’t mean to induce any form of hate or negativity in families or even friend’s circles. I have seen people breaking and dying under pressure.
When the person holding all the foundations break, the entire building collapses. Be a little kinder to people who go extra mile for you and try to share their load.
Everyone has a breaking point.
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Kindly visit my post Warriors Invited To Raise Mental Health Awareness where I invite Mental Health Warriors to submit their blog’s address so that we can join hands to control this wildfire.
Well said Stonner! I agree that our Asian society is the worst in this aspect. We do need to break the mold.
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Exactly. We conviniently shift the burden of whole khandan on one person. It’s unfair and inhumane.
It’s high time we start speaking up and try to break the mold wherever we can. I know it’s easier said than done but we have to start somewhere.
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Exactly! We start with our own families. I’m glad to say that my son plays an equal role as my daughter in law in raising their 2 year old.
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That’s awesome. He is being a good role model for his daughter. 🙂
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He has a son and I think it’s even better.
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I agree!
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👍👍👍
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For his child*
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Thanks 🤩
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Idk why I automatically assumed it’s a daughter lol.
But we keep discussing we need to teach boys from young age. After mom my brother and sister both are equally found cooking in the kitchen. And during lockdown dad would do the dishes. In most parts of the world, this is normal but people around us were surprised.
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I know, if a man is doing housework in Pakistan, people assume that he is a “baichara“ While if the prime minister of uk cooks food then that is fine!
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Ahhaahah 😂🤣
Oh the accuracy of this..
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👍
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