Scars

Before I would go completely unhinged, I decided to go out shopping like I used to do in pre-pandemic era.

Best part Sam, was with me.

Somewhere in the middle I stopped to check how was new mascara holding. It was a small free sample that came with something else and I loving it!

I noticed my eyes looking normal (relatively) after 6 years!

I have/had autoimmune. It’s calm these days but my last attack dislocated my one eyeball as I had inflammation behind my eye. It was horrifying initially and then frustrating and embarrassing for years that followed. It took years of different treatment and surgeries to get here.

I have other issues too, thanks to prednisone/steroids, excess hard-to-lose weight being the top issue.

After 6 years, yesterday it looked a lot like old me.

I still have some difference. I still have some swollen tissues behind my eye that can’t be removed.

A portion of my face can’t feel anything because of minor nerve damage during a surgery.

But who waits for you to recover completely?

To heal? To be comfortable with your situation and yourself.

Life doesn’t wait.

People don’t wait.

A time comes you stand up and continue walking alone no matter how hard it is.

Not because you will be left behind. Because you don’t have choice.

It’s not about success, it’s for survival!

And what is success?? Why isn’t it satisfying people?

I have seen apparently successful people being restless and unsatisfied for God knows what reason. I’m a struggler I can never know.

And then I wonder, what’s the point if it’s not even making them happy.

Well.

Where were we?

Eyes!

So yea it was nice looking at myself looking normal after a long time.

After falling sick I realized I wasn’t that bad before. Wish I knew that earlier. I took myself for granted.

We only value things once we lose them.

Chronic illnesses leave long-term (sometimes permanent) marks. It takes time to treat, recover, heal and eventually get comfortable with new you.

But once you embrace your scars, very few things have potential to break you. 

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Kindly visit my post Warriors Invited To Raise Mental Health Awareness where I invite Mental Health Warriors to submit their blog’s address so that we can join hands to control this wildfire.

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