What doesnt kill you gives you mental illness

I was talking to a woman who has been through unimaginable pain in life. She is very close to me.

She is been sick for some time and finally doctors diagnosed her condition as fibromyalgia with PTSD.

First thing everyone told her was “don’t stressing yourself” “go somewhere” ‘don’t be depressed’ as stress is major factor.

I prepared my own speech. i had to cover all areas since I have known her since forever I know her whole life.

I called her and i started with every person close to her and tried to calmly explain she shouldn’t be worried about anyone.

She listened and she said ‘trust me I havent even been thinking about anyone or whatever happened. But can I erase my past? Whatever happened to me is sitting in my subconscious it travels with me it lives with me and it doesn’t warn me what it’s going to do next momemnt”

I had no answer.

We have recently seen 2 extreme incidents of mental illness in family.

Relatives are voluntarily going to therapists and psychiatrist.

Mental illness is as visible as physical as any other illness when you see it happening to people around you.

And it does claim your life.

This is an alarming situation.

I feel scared numb and helpless.

What should we do then?

There is one thing that should have happened. I don’t know if it matters now.

When she was going through living hell people should have stood by her. They should have supported her.

They could save her then and today this probably wouldn’t be happening.

We let someone suffer. We have millions of excuses to justify our insensitivity.

Then we isolate them because their life was hell. Forgetting that we had some responsibility too.

Then when they give up on us we assume that they are fine.

We always assume they are doing fine. We dont want to hear otherwise.

We don’t realise what we are feeding their subconscious.

I am trying to think of a solution but I can’t.

We can’t erase anything.

But we sure can prevent it. We can speak up when it’s time.

We can stand by people when they are falling apart.

Sometimes it doesn’t even take anything to just show some support. Some validation.

I don’t know what I am going to do. And what can be done now.

It’s so frustrating.


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33 thoughts on “What doesnt kill you gives you mental illness

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  1. I’m not sure what your loved one experienced, but I have experienced some very painful moments in my life which I still can’t get over and continues to upset me, though it happened years ago. Some memories don’t easily fade away, but everything happens for a reason, which may not be apparent to us. It can be painful to come to terms with, especially if you don’t understand why it happened. Sending you and your friend my love and thoughts x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Her worst time was over may be more than a decade ago. She has grown up kids. But nothing has faded. She is religious too. It’s hard to process how can something happen to people like her. Please remember her in your prayers. I keep telling her we can’t lose faith in justice it will happen one day. But no one can erase what people do to each other..

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Yes, I think the most painful things can happen to the most religious people. We are tested according to the level of our faith.

    “Allaah will not leave the believers in the state in which you are now, until He distinguishes the wicked from the good.” [Aal ‘Imraan 3:179] 

    Allah wants us to show Him that we will continue devoting ourselves to Him, despite the trials He sends our way, and that can be a mighty challenge, but one day worth it, when the believers reach jannah and taste the bliss of paradise, as a reward for our suffering.

    And you’re right, there will be justice on the day of judgement. Hold on sweety, Allah can see all of our pain xx

    Liked by 1 person

  3. The fact you are talking to her must help even if its only slightly. We think there is a solution to everything, but sometimes the route out is long and painful. My partner has also got ptsd. I sometimes cannot see a way out of how he feels. Today he said why do you still love me. All I could say is because I do. I could never give up on him. I’m sending love to you and your friend. I know its pointless talking about staying strong. I just hope things can slowly improve. Xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I have had an episode that lasted a week to 10 days. 10 days were enough to understand what people who have this go through. A family member was mine was diagnosed PTSD too and you are right sometimes it feels there is no way out.

      You are an amazing woman. It’s hard to stay with someone who struggles to comprehend his own condition .

      I really hope thing improve. I know a friend with fibromyalgia and after few incidents we know a few psychiatrist/counselor/therapists who can at least help her from getting worse. She is accepting of her situation and already saying I dont want to end up like them. So that first step. Will device something soon. I hope things get better too. Xx


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