Illusion of perfection

Illusion of perfection..A mirage..

How easy it is to call things perfect. Somebody’s life perfect. People perfect.

The other day my friend said “I was perfect and look what happened to me” and all I could do was look at her dumbfounded, as she was in great distress already. But it was running in my head.

You aren’t perfect. Stop calling yourself that. We are humans. We are flawed on different levels and that is what makes us human.

Then how can you expect perfection from life of a person.

Doesn’t it sound ridiculous to you?

Think about it. You are in a car and from a distance you are looking at this mirage. It’s a pool of shimmering water right??

But it’s just an optical illusion. That’s all.

As you will go near it will disappear into oblivion. Absorbed into the earth like it never existed. It’s a deceit to the eyes that tricks you to think how beautiful that particular spot is.

I once read “only normal people are those you don’t know very well.” And I couldn’t agree more.

My family situation has been a mirage all my life. Until few years back we were hit by tribulations we just couldn’t conceal.

I had a pair of exemplary man and woman as my parents, who were submissively obedient to the norms. And that’s what ascended them into the category of great people.

I look around and most of kids say similar things about their parents.

Then we were thrown in the mix. The kids.

We opened our life and saw them, the paradigm of our culture’s expectation.

My dad made sure we had everything. We had nothing to complain on the surface. But it’s not that we never had issues.

They never had to say anything but there was this innate pressure on our shoulders of maintaining this status quo.

We were expected to continue the legacy of blind compliance that had been snatching away our basic human right of freedom of forming an opinion and voicing it, the freedom of expression.

We couldn’t afford to make mistakes as there were always greedy vultures circling around looking for one slight mistake to attack us.

This is insane.

Some of you might think, oh look at another ungrateful person who never had anything to complain.

But it’s like walking on a measuring tape drawn by people you shouldn’t be answerable to, when you weren’t even born.

You can’t mess with the intervals.

It’s depressing, devastating emotionally.

But then few years back when the visible turbulences shook our life, I was wondering why we wasted our lives polishing a glass wall that had to be shattered to the ground by natural disasters eventually.

We never lived freely.

It was like taking half a breath, always safe or you might disturb the winds.

Always afraid of what people might think even if you are a crazy rebellious person inside, you need to don a straight wrinkle free cloak.

I have lived enough life to realize it’s absurd to blame anybody for what has happened already. It’s not an individual’s fault. It just happened.

All I can do is try to build a strong wall in place of that broken glass one.

Or let there be no wall at all.

It will take us time to get used to the passing winds. It will take us time to worry less about unimportant opinions.

And above all it will take time to convince my loved ones that we just don’t need this wall, anymore. And it’s going to be a taxing process, but it needs to be said one day.

I don’t know how long it’s going to take.

Copyright © 2017 stoneronarollercoaster – All rights reserved

Image Credit: google


14 thoughts on “Illusion of perfection

  1. I have concluded that we are similar in so many ways Lt. Stoner. We both come from modest families, but remoted view on our lives gives us better perspective on ourselves. I see you poses certain level of introspection, which is a sign of intelligence. Bravo, Lt. Stoner.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I always love reading your posts. I completely agree that one is perfect and I too think it is ridiculous to spend your life trying to live up to the status quo. It is exhausting and something I have dealt with in my family as well. It can be stressful and aggravating.

    Liked by 2 people

      1. It is, but all we can do is be who we are, regardless of the people in the world who can’t accept that, they are missing out, because are awesome! 😊👍❤️


  3. Really heart felt and insightful writing.
    Tackling deep-seated habits and behaviours in families is probably one of the biggest challenges in life and unfortunately many people understandably shy away from the enormous difficulties this poses. In a family group we all end up taking up the shape of jigsaw puzzle and if we try to change shape, the other pieces tend to create more and more resistance, trying to get you to stick to the rules and your established shape in the family- and not do anything different.
    Giving others in the relationship a heads up that you are actively in a process of change can help others to express their doubts about the status quo and start to shift the patterns. Just my thoughts!
    All the best, Rollercoaster


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