Lost..

One of the major drawbacks of living on the impulsive side is one day you want to accomplish a million tasks..

Next day you don’t want to do anything..

The day after you have a lot to do but you don’t know what you want ..today is that kind of day..

Since I started living “follow your heart” motto this year, things tend to go crazy at times.

I have 71 unread books.. and I don’t know which one to read now..

I was away from my guitar for 2 months (which was already new addition in my life) and now I have forgotten how to even hold it!

I don’t know what to sketch/draw next…

Even my doctor is on vacation.

Suddenly I have lost the direction of everything… this is where being reckless brought me…

I just let my life flow with the tide without Rhyme or reason. I have enjoyed it and I still am enjoying it. It has been healing me when everything else was failing.

Taking a back seat…delegating decisions where possible.. taking a deep breath and stop worrying for while did trigger a much needed mental detox.

But this is first time in months I am completely lost..

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20 thoughts on “Lost..

  1. I love the line from the song that goes, “If you’re lost you can always be found.” Enjoy it or at least don’t sweat it. We all have days like this. If you’re really restless, go for a walk or a run. That always helps.

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  2. It’s said you have to lose everything before you can find yourself. Personal experience would tell me this is true. Maybe you’re ennui has a little of that too it.

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  3. A moment or six, a calm place, and the right book to read will be there, just when you need it. Nothing else matters while in the calm place. Close your eyes, see the space that is yours alone, step in, and take a seat – it’s comfortable – lie down, and wait for the book to speak its words to you.

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  4. I have been where you are, but mines has been a constant cycle. Every year, month, and week that passes by I go through a cycle of new hobbies and extreme excitement for those hobbies. But then in a few days, weeks if I am lucky, all the excitement fades away. I have a shelf full of books from when I was in the mood to read more. I think I made it through 3 or 4 books and then stopped. I remedied this by joining a book club. I have moments when I want to draw like crazy and then I wake up one day and can’t stomach the thought of drawing. I have been dying to get an acoustic guitar and teach myself to play, but honestly that might be another hobby added to the millions of hobbies short lived (I am still going to do it). Now I am blogging, which by the way I have done once before, and eventually that passion faded as well. I am hoping for better luck this time around. But this cycle happens to me constantly and I will eventually go back to these hobbies and proceed through the cycle again and again and again. Maybe there is nothing wrong with that, but for some reason it bothers me. Anyways, even with those days I try to stay positive which sounds cliche but I have to or I will fall back into my old ways of laying on my couch sleeping all day and accomplishing nothing, which feels worst than my constant change in moods. I wish you the best and I hope that things get better for you! Your definitely not alone and I enjoyed reading your post. Sorry about the long comment 🙂 – Laila

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    1. you sound so much like me!
      about the book.. i figured if you read 50 pages straight without shutting the book you will end up reading the whole book. its the initial push we need.
      about drawing … you need to be in the mood to even begin. i don’t touch sketchbook until i really want to do it.
      acoustic guitar…have it but need so much of practice and dedication.
      i keep all of this around me so that i at least know i can do something.
      i m glad you manage to stay positive because thats the hardest part.
      no need to say sorry. i m glad you shared. actually felt i m not alone in this.

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      1. Your definitely not alone. It is refreshing to know that neither am I. I went so long thinking I was the only one and started to feel like I was broken or that something was wrong with me. And the whole stay positive isn’t easy for me. Yesterday I woke up got dress got some blog stuff done and then mid day I just started crying for no reason at all. I felt so sad and I didn’t know why. Today I got dressed again, had some coffee and decided to read through some of my followers posts and I feel ok, but part of me is scared that it won’t last. The staying positive is the hardest part for sure because you have to find a way to be happy when your body is telling that your not, even if you have no reason not to be happy. It sucks all the time. I figure if I tell myself to be positive it will trick my mind into actually staying that way. It is a battle that you only lose when you give up. So I take everything one day at a time and focus on just getting through that day ok and hope for a better day the next. It’s frustrating but necessary. I don’t want to be sad and I will be damned if I keep letting myself stand in my way of being happy. My blog and meeting people like you are what keeps me going, it is good when you don’t feel alone, because the world can make you feel that way all the time. No one wants to feel alone. And you and me are not, at least not anymore! 👍😉-Laila

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      2. wow. you sound so much like me. these are the things..every word of it..that i keep saying all the time.
        staying positive is a constant struggle theres no denying that and i dont even always win. i do succumb to the wierd emptiness at times.
        we just have different way of dealing with this. everybody comes up with thier own survival formula (i have a blog post on it underconstruction already).
        you do feel broken but when you start talking to people a point comes when you say…we all are broken maybe and we all are struggling.
        i m glad to find you here 🙂

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