Ill-fated Carousel

“I don’t want to end up like them…”

I have said it .. I have said it more than I ever imagined I would.

And every time I uttered these words… the same chill ran through me… The same fear of committing a mistake when you are well aware of the dreadful consequences.

The same despair… when you know you are slipping in this quick sand and you are not even trying to save yourself…not even asking for help…

“live your life, forget the people, forget the past, forget the future, today is yours…your life is yours…please please please live it for your own self..i know people who didn’t and it didn’t go well…” I have begged! I have begged more than I imagined I ever would!

But my words fell flat on deaf ears…

My screaming pleas were repelled by petrified silence of the slaves of the norms.

My efforts strangled by the puppeteers.

Acid of traditions thrown at my face until by passion succumbed to the pain.

Allegations shoved in my throat until my voice died..

We are riding the same old ill-fated Carousel

Same ride..

Same pace..

Same gruesome views..

Same accidents..

Same wounds …

Just the generation of riders has changed…

Copyright © 2017 stoneronarollercoaster – All rights reserved

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26 thoughts on “Ill-fated Carousel

      1. Don’t worry it’s just the aftereffects of a battle. It will heal, in time.. Right now my sleeping too has got effected.. Sometime I can go on for 2 days with a 4 hr. break.. Other times I can work only for 4-6 hrs, and sleep the whole time. Yesterday and today was the latter.. Take care..

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Back to back three quick ailments, it’s good but not to the normal level.. And I don’t drink tea, did you forget already, Chai addict.. Haha..

        Liked by 1 person

      3. OK sorry, not an expert.. And I know you are too having health issues.. You gave me a scare with the radiotherapy comment, remember.. And you too eat well, and don’t drink plenty of water.. It will cause a loose bladder and impact your sleep..

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Ouch that must have horrid effect.. My friend recently went under the knife for a major surgery.. And steroids.. Let me say he is not a happy customer.. But it’s important..

        Liked by 1 person

      5. Scary.. How crazy the Non essential drugs are becoming Essential.. Not surprising.. The latter have a price ceiling.. Except for the West..

        Liked by 1 person

      6. In my case they said take it or you will die. It was voilent inflamation so this looked like only option. Steroids are really cheap my others meds were ridiculously expensive. They were as imp as steroids.
        I actually got treated in uae… still under treatment there. I am on a trip here. I actually live there. Most of my docs were from west, and the hospitals as well as my hospitals are branches of some from west. And my mom was getting treated in states.
        So we are fimiliar with the procedures and laws and approach of docs of different places. And trust me its same everywhere when it comes to pumping meds in your system. Its crazy.

        Liked by 1 person

      7. UAE. The only thing I know about the place is Porsche police cars.. And of course Haj.. Never been there. But there is a reason why it’s cheap over there. No tax. In States and other nations it’s the opposite, Essential are cheap, my friend father full salary went for the drugs.. Thank God for insurance.. And what happened to your Mom? Man you should take care…the only time steroids were prescribed to me, was when I had an Autoimmune disease.. It has 80% chance of recurrence.. But so far so good.. But at least we know what they are pumping into our system..

        Liked by 1 person

      8. Yeah fancy cars everywhere.
        For Haj we go to Saudi Arabia, Khaaba is there. Not uae.

        Steroids are cheap everywhere.
        Uae is insanely expensive. Specially dubai. States is way cheaper that dubai. Insurance is the life saver.
        Mom has cancer.

        You had autoimmune?? Dont tell me?? When?? Which one???

        Liked by 1 person

      9. No I mean through UAE. Everyone knows the Saudi is where Kabba is. It’s just that everyone stops at UAE to shop. It’s like free.. No import tax..
        Cancer, oh no.. Is she OK..?
        It was more of a symptom for another disease.. My eyes got infected.. Still not healthy for a blood test. What is funny is that the immunosuppressants gifted me another disease.. My mom was horrified by my condition.. And it lead to another.. Right now it’s OK.. But let’s see where it take us..

        Like

      10. ok..got it.
        umm..no she’s not ok. i stayed here for her..last stage.
        what are the odds… i have autoimmune of eye. but it didn’t show in my blood test.
        what exactly did you have?? and what did immunosuppressants give you.. if you dont mind me asking..

        Liked by 1 person

      11. No, the blood test will reveal if I have the other problem or not.. The docs think the eye Autoimmune may have been a symptom.. Well it was related to lungs. The infection spread and water rushed in. Lost a ton of weight. Became malnourished… Still am.. But I’m not worried. Just want to go away from all this..

        Sorry to hear about your Mom, though. I send my regards..

        Just take care of yourself and don’t get sick. The last thing you need is an Autoimmune disease and an infection at the same time like me.. Basically you can’t do anything..

        Liked by 1 person

      12. Hmm. They do chk everything specially lung thyroid to make sure. Eat well then. I have been on steroids and immunosupressants for 2.5 years straight healthy diet is compulsory. Now have to go back and get myself chked for damage of medicine. I feel my bones have weakened.
        Well..thats life.

        Mom is a warrior. She is still the one handling all of us.

        In the begining i was taking care. I have disinfectants of every form scattered in my home. Right now i am a little careless but i will get back to routine soon.

        And yes.. you cant do anything

        Liked by 1 person

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