Anxiety – A Battle With Invisible Demon

As May is observed as Mental Health Month, I would like to give my two cents on anxiety based on my own experience.

I have steroids induced anxiety. I have been on steroids and immunosuppressant for autoimmune and that revved-up my brain.

I was already a restive person by nature.

I used to wash my hands innumerous times a day. It was like even if water touches my hand I had to wash it.

I had shredder fitted in my hands. I had uncontrollable urge to tear a paper once I held it. You could find tiny pieces of tissues and paper wherever I sat.

I would constantly scratch pencil and twist pins during lectures.

I always had trouble sleeping no matter how tired I was.

I could never stand straight and if I had something on my mind I would pace like a caged lion.

Once I was put on prednisone (steroids) shit hit the fan!

As there wasn’t a proper diagnosis and I didn’t know how long it will take to be my normal self again, I was living in constant paranoia.

Anxiety makes you restless to the point where you lose control on yourself.

You are worried about anything and everything.

At the peak of side-effects I could feel air leaving from pores of the skin of my arms. This is the most awfully horrifying feeling ever. I wished I could scratch my skin off.

I was fighting an invisible demon, nobody could tell what’s happening to me. Had I tried to explain, they wouldn’t be able to understand.

My doctors have been incredibly kind and supportive. They altered my medicine to make my situation a bit endurable and they were always there to lend ears.

I would like to request everybody who has a loved one facing any mental disorder, specially anxiety;

  • You have no idea what a person is going through so please be a bit considerate and tolerant with them.
  • If you detect any red flag please talk to the person and suggest them they seek help. And be there for them.
  • They are not over-reacting don’t tell them so!
  • They can’t control their reactions don’t base your judgments on them.
  • If they want to be alone for sometime let them be… don’t call them an introvert.
  • Don’t call them a Psycho for the love of God!
  • They may come as a bit clingy as they crave for love and care at this point, try to understand them.
  • They do have temperament issues. Again, please be patient. If you disagree with them talk to them nicely when they have calmed down.
  • Trying to impose anything will ruin them, as they are really sensitive and vulnerable because of their condition.
  • Don’t tell them “it’s nothing” just because you can’t see it.

The list can go on and on. Just be a good human to them.

Please don’t push them from the edge of the Precipice, where they are already standing wishing they could jump.

 

Copyright © 2017 stoneronarollercoaster – All rights reserved

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10 thoughts on “Anxiety – A Battle With Invisible Demon

  1. Your last line is absolutely perfect. You also gave lots of great advice in this post, as I see it having endured anxiety so many times in my life.

    I’m sorry you’ve had to take medications like prednisone. My husband suffered a lot from that med.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Got tappered off completely month back after 2.5 years. still facing withdrawl symtoms.
      People call it devil’s tic tac and i understand why.
      I just pray nobody has to take meds like prednisone immuran cellcept ( i have been on all of them) or any medication.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. This is a sad but informative post for me. My heart breaks for the torture you have been through. I really appreciate you sharing insights and tips on what others should/should not do in response to anxiety attacks/chronic anxiety. May God grant you peace and healing.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I suffer from severe anxiety. It all was medication induced. Began with Anaphylaxis in 5 mins. of new med. Medication and me just dont mesh. I hate Prednisone. Had to take to make my face go from basketball size back down to my norm after that severe allergic incident. I have said no to them ever since. Which is hard having Eplilepsy and auto immune issues. Some meds make me crawl. Anxiety is a nightmare. I have learned coping mechanisms, but it is as if my nervous system is shot. God has always brought me through. Anxiety is nothing I wish on my worst enemy. Torturous in nature. Hang tight. Give it up to Him!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. O God!
      Reading this gave me creeps.
      I still have moon face and cushing syndrome. Hate hate HATE IT!
      and you are right you cant avoid these medicines when u are that unwell. And you cant explain what you are going through thats the worst part.
      They are life savers and life destroyers at the same time.
      I m far better than before now.
      But anxiety is here to stay i guess..

      Liked by 1 person

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