Brain fry is the first thought that crossed my mind when I saw the word “fry”.
No, not the one you eat, the one that cooks in your brain when you have to tolerate somebody extraordinarily annoying.
I could write a book on this one, but then I will have to come up with volumes. Recently I had the worst traveling experience of my life. It wasn’t the flight it was the passengers.
First there was a lady in boarding lounge who wouldn’t stop shooting questions at me, although I had dug my face in a book.
Lady: Are you traveling alone??
Lady: Why don’t we sit together then??
Me: Umm.. okay
Lady: Where are you going??
Me: Where this flight is going??
Lady: I mean to whom.
Me: To see my family.
Lady: Oh meeting family is so much fun.. ahaha..
Me: Umm.. it’s a funeral.
Me: A family member’s.
Lady: See this is happening a lot these day.
Wait! what??? Death is happening a lot?? WHAT!!!
Mental note:- I SHOULD NOT, MUST NOT, WILL NOT SIT WITH THIS WOMAN!!
Somehow I managed to stay away, but my head’s temperature was already high enough to fry my brain.
In the flight some jerk was sitting next to me. Once in flight I normally wear my invisible horse blinders and mind my own business so I didn’t even see his face.
“Excuse me ma’am, do you need a pen to fill this form”, this wasn’t the voice of a steward it was of passenger next to me.
Me: No, thank you.
Khalil Gibran to the rescue, please save me!! I dug my face in the book again.
Jerk: Do you need water??
Me: No, thanks.
He would repeat anything the airhostess would say. Seriously? I heard that already. Why do you have to give your own version? Apparently looking busy reading a book wasn’t helping. Thanks to the window seat I fixed my gaze on the clouds, and wished I could break the window and jump.
Jerk: Ma’am I think we have to fill this form.
Please don’t add the seasoning!
I didn’t say anything. I could smell something burning. It’s ok! That’s from my head.
This continued for good half an hour. I was cursing myself for not sitting with that woman. She was better than him at least.
Jerk: Where are you going??
Jerk: We are together for this 2 hour long journey. Why don’t we converse nicely?
WTF!!!! The last strand of my patience snapped!!!
Me: Look bro!! I m going for a funeral, please don’t talk to me. AT ALL!!!
Phew!! The remaining 1.5 hours went considerably peaceful. I saved my brain from going well done to burnt!
I am sure people could easily see smoke coming out of my ears, and smell perfectly cook, actually a bit over-done brainFry.